strawberry fields forevah.

Brisk warm breeze continuously whipping our hair into a nature-inspired style.
Blue sky. Sun. Typical California. Just a day in the life.
Pacific Sun organic farm. Woodland. Strawberry fields. You pick. Gallon bucket to fill- $12- plus eat eat eat all that you can while you pick.
Joaquin. Carlos. Me.
Perfect day.

Forget the movies. Forget the time. Forget toys. Forget the gas prices.
And pick strawberries in the sun. Engage all your senses. Eat them fresh off the plant while warm strawberry juice rushes in and out of your lips. Look up.
Observe the bees co-creating. Smile. Watch Joaquin take his first bite of a sun ripened strawberry. Breathe deep. This is joy.

Hi Joaquin...please unlock the door for mama...

It is twilight, a soothing shade of blue that welcomes the night. I sit on the patio, wrapped in a shawl, feeling the evening breeze blow by me. I quietly sit, eyes closed, hearing the evening wrapping up for the day. The last of the birds are eating the seed on the ground, the trees are restless, and the light continues to blue. After a thoughtful reflection and welcoming the calm to usher me into the evening, I get up and see Joaquin smiling at me through the sliding glass door.
'What an angel', I think to myself.
I unhurriedly arise out of my chair and step towards the slider. Joaquin and I have a spontaneous play session with the slider separating us for the time. Then, Joaquin's eyes twinkle as he casually walks closer to the door and matter-of-factly locks me out. I immediately think...'I'm so glad Carlos is home!' simultaneously with "I didn't know he could do that!', as I sweetly ask if he can unlock the door and let mama in. He obliges, confirming a new task he has mastered...locking people in and out of places.
I consider myself warned.

In rememberance and honor...

Hatred paralyzes life, love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it.

~Martin Luther King Jr.

I am beyond inspired by this idea.

www.oneworldeverybodyeats.org

Vision Statement:

* We are dedicated to eliminating world hunger.

* We are dedicated to serving organic unprocessed food.

* We are dedicated to feeding and including all members of our community.

* We are dedicated to eliminating waste in the food industry.

* We believe that we can trust our customers to be inspired, honest and fair in their exchange of money and/or work for the fresh, gourmet, organic food we prepare both mindfully and in a heartfelt way each day.

* We will keep believing ...

happy birthday Joaquin

How can I thank you for making me a mama? You are teaching me so much, and I would have never imagined how amazing it would be to see you wake up each day and notice you have grown-just a bit- maybe a new word pops out or you seem a little taller. What day did you change from my 8-pounds-exactly infant into this little boy who hugs and kisses so freely? My heart is filled and overflowing with gratitude. For you.

So today, in our family tradition, we walk the labyrinth. In silence, as best possible, to reflect and celebrate Joaquin joining our lives. As the labyrinth shows us, there is one path-but many turns. One can often feel lost, although it is just an illusion...all paths are unobstructed to the center. One eventually reaches the center with ease if they continue to walk the path. I am honored to walk this life with you Joaquin.

Happy Birthday.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Labyrinth

'And when he sees me in all and sees all in me,
Then I never leave him and he never leaves me.
And he, who in this oneness of love
Loves me in whatever he sees,
Wherever this man may live,
In truth, he lives in me...'

Bhagavad Gita, VI:30,31

a masterpiece

I catch a view of my hand, and stop breathing for just a second. I breathe in again, this time without fear or shock. I'm going to have to get to know these new hands of mine.

They are no longer the smooth, tanned, taut, buttery canvasas that used to wrap freely around the steering wheel of my 71 VW squareback. The wrinkles and loosening of the skin show that I am growing. I am aging. I will be 35 this year. I know that is not old. I am a mother. I am a wife. A social worker. A woman. Dare I say...an artist? eek! No! I am still not ready to affix that label on myself. The lines and new spots on my hands map out a journey of my life. A fantastic and complicated journey, yet one that is always changing. Because...life...is always changing. With each new line, life doodles on my skin...I stand, observing the new work of art. A crisscross of patterns. I want to be critical because I don't like the composition initally. I quickly understand that won't help, as there are no corrections in these lines...they are done with sharpies-not pencil. So, I look for the story-the meaning-behind the artwork. I reflect.

I'm still reflecting. I still don't love the lines, but we are friends now. The lines are a growing family. I'm beginning to let go...to understand that life is an ongoing process of releasing and embracing. Again and again, over and over. Motherhood is bringing this into focus for me, in a way I have never experienced before. Just when I get used to myself and the regular-ness of everyday life, life will teach me that I don't really know the depth of my being- of our being- and offers me yet another opportunity to go deeper into my life, values, relationships, and the nitty-gritty of who I am underneath this canvas. I'm almost certain that with time, I will see the masterpiece. But that will take a well-trained eye.