Life is vividly beautiful when you think you have a brain tumor.
Life is vividly beautiful when you find out you don't.

home sweet home

I love the ocean. I really love the ocean.
Is it the waves, white caps, predictability, unpredictability, the sound, the light reflecting off it, the fog hiding it, the power, the calm, the straightness of the horizon, the eternity of it all, or the humbling and contented feelings I often have when near it? Maybe all of the above. And more. I think it is that 'more' that enthralls me the most.

After spending a week at Bodega Bay with our family, along with grandmothers, I felt like I had visited an old friend again. I pondered, smiled, laughed, and took deep breaths of the cool tangible air. I gazed at the ocean as if I was seeing it's beauty for the first time. I have a hard time taking my eyes away from it, but when I do, behind closed lids, it bubbles and crashes leaving a moment of complete peace before beginning again. In and out, like breath. Repeat.

CROW clothing

I'm very excited about this company, their clothing, and business model. (no this is not a paid advertisement) Eco-conscious, handmade, sliding scale pricing, woman-owned, Portland.

CROW clothing

special feature playing for a limited time only

We have turned into somewhat of a birdwatching family. Especially Joaquin and I, as we spend many meals looking out at the bird feeder. This bird feeder has drawn regular birds, including one specific family of finches. The male is adorned with bright red hood and vest, and the female usually eats with him at the feeder. This female recently started building a nest in the corner of our covered patio. I would watch her day after day, slowly constructing this new home. I was honored she would choose our patio. So some time went by, and one day I saw the male in the nest appearing to be regurgitating. I had never seen him in the nest before, and strained to see if there were baby birds in the nest. It appeared that some little blob was meeting at dads mouth, but I couldn't be certain. A couple days later, I saw 3 little open mouths popping out of the nest, eyes closed, very still. I thought they were dead initially, but was relieved to see two of them open and close their mouths while I watched. And watched. And watched. There is something very special about watching a family of birds take residence and have baby birds. Joaquin calls them "Beebee burds". I love hearing him say that.

Today when I went to check the nest, they were bigger, more alert, fuzzier, and there were FOUR of them! We are all enjoying this special feature playing for a limited time only.
click on the photo above to see them in better detail.

welcome summer.

viral social change

Really enjoyed this article...excerpt:

For us to wait for legislation or technology to solve the problem of how we're living our lives suggests we're not really serious about changing--something our politicians cannot fail to notice. They will not move until we do. Indeed, to look to leaders and experts, to laws and money and grand schemes, to save us from our predicament represents precisely the sort of thinking--passive, delegated, dependent for solutions on specialists--that helped get us into this mess in the first place. It's hard to believe that the same sort of thinking could now get us out of it.

blast from the past. The Cure.

So, if you dont know this about me, I was a HUGE fan of the Cure in elementary school, with fan following during highschool on and off. My room was a shrine to red-lip-stick-smeared faces, super-teased hair shellacked, pasty skin, and, of course, the color black. I loved me some Cure, although I wasn't a goth on the 'outside'. I never did, however, like Peter Murphy. Or Bauhause. So I could never really be a true goth. A touch of new wave I did have, however.

Well, these days I can say that I hadn't listened in many, many years to any Cure music. Toooooooo dark for me these days. But, I was a little renewed when my cousin Katy asked me to see the Cure with her in San Jose. I said yes, expecting these crusty old rockers to be amusing for the night, sounding a little old- because they are. Well, the show rocked. Alot. The sound was amazing, the songs were OLD yay!, and they played for 3 straight hours. 3 hours. 3 encores. Amazing. I only thought bands like RUSH and the Dead did that. It was a goth rock marathon show, and Im so happy I shared it with my cuz.

Here's the set for the night:
plainsong, prayers for rain, fascination street, the perfect boy, the blood, the end of the world, lovesong, to wish impossible things, pictures of you, lullaby, catch, hot hot hot, the only one, a strange day, sleep when i'm dead, push, doing the unstuck, inbetween days, just like heaven, a letter to elise, from the edge of the deep green sea, shake dog shake, wrong number, one hundred years, disintegration,
E1: at night, m, play for today, a forest,
E2: freakshow, close to me, why can't i be you?,
E3: boys don't cry, jumping someone else's train, grinding halt, 10:15 saturday night, killing an arab